A bottle of Scoville Growth Fund I hot sauce on a mahogany desk beside its private-placement box and a deal memorandum, city skyline at dusk

Offering memorandum / Now open

Take a positionin heat.

Small-batch hot sauces for people with an unreasonable appetite for risk.

Explore the funds Gift a position

SCVL: $16
Flavor: ▲ 18%
Heat: ▲ 247%
Regret: ▲ 1,102%

01 / The portfolio

Diversify your dinner.

Five funds. Varying levels of restraint.

Seed Capital

Conservative

$14

Liquid Assets

Opportunistic

$15

Scoville Growth Fund I

Aggressive

$16

Leveraged Buyout

Highly Leveraged

$16

Hostile Takeover

Speculative

$18

Swipe to see all five funds →

02 / The thesis

High finance. Higher heat.

The most underpriced asset in any kitchen is a properly made hot sauce. Every fund is fermented, bottled and labelled by hand in small runs. Over a long enough horizon, bland underperforms every time.

Hostile to bland.

All five Capsaicin Capital funds lined up on a steakhouse table beside a whiskey, a glass of red wine and a sliced steak

03 / Gifting

A gift with upside.

For the colleague who has everything, except exposure to heat.

Gift set / All five funds

The Diversified Portfolio

Every fund, boxed like a private placement and sealed with a subscription agreement your recipient will never read.

$72

Subscription / Every quarter

The Quarterly Dividend

A limited-release fund delivered every quarter, alongside a shareholder letter from the desk of the fund manager.

$38/ quarter

04 / Investor relations

Join the LP list.

Early allocations on new funds and a quarterly shareholder letter. Unsubscribe whenever the heat gets to be too much.